HAPPY NEW YEAR?

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For several weeks now I have been writing, praying, wishing folks a “Happy New Year”. Now I am having second thoughts about that expression. Not that I am taking anything back, but Charlie wonders about the words.  (Martha reminds me that I often get hung up on words). The new year is a reality I don’t quarrel with.  But what does the “happy” mean.  For some it means have a blast, a party.  Even the common New Year’s Day hangover is not a total waste.  It reminds one at the start of the year the pain and discomfort that accompany shortcuts to “happiness.”  Maybe happy means your football team wins (Yeah OU, OSU and Spurs!) Maybe it is a wish for more and tastier food. Or does it refer to the entire coming  year. Some refer to the year 2011 specifically.  But to wish anyone a whole year of happiness? Now we have left reality unless we are wishing they would die and go to heaven. But to live out the coming year in a state of perfect bliss with no episodes of unhhappiness is fantasy. Whatever happens in 2011 will be just that.  Only our reactions to what happens determines our level of happiness. Maybe I could just pray that we all might look at whatever happens through the loving eyes of God and know that then our responses will produce the joy and peace that God desires for us.

CHRISTMAS 2010

“O Holy Night . . . Long lay the world in sin and error pining ‘til He appeared and the soul felt its worth”. At our house we are learning that as the body/ mind ages and slows down we are blessed with the time that helps us enjoy our God-given essence. We are giving up trying to explain these discoveries of our inner being except to say it feels wonderful.  

We are further blessed with friends and family that enrich our lives almost daily. Nearly thirty of of our grown children, in-laws and partners, grandchildren, great-grandchildren live in our San Antonio-Austin neighborhood plus Kathy and her family in Oklahoma and Washington D. C. (where Crystal passed her bar exam). We are love rich.

This year most of us got together for Charles’ 80th birthday party and again for Kathy’s visit to San Antonio this fall.  In September Charles and Martha got away to New Orleans to celebrate our 28th wedding anniversary and Martha’s 78th birthday.  Kimi and Keri did their own version of escape with a trip to Europe and a cruise on the Med.  

As another year draws to a close and as more of our family and friends depart, we are aware of the impermanence of everything and that by accepting this reality we are making the most of freed-up spirits and the heaven that Jesus said is among us.  So its on to celebrating His coming and making joyful life  possible. Won’t you join us with a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.?         

I AM I SAID

Recently, on the way into Bible Study, a friend greeted me and asked casually and sincerely, “How are you?” I answered, “I am . . .” I then paused and felt confused as I searched for a word to finish my sentence. I could too easily have answered with the usual “fine”, or  “never been better,” or “can’t complain” (before proceding to do so).  With this particular friend I could have answered, “better than you” but that would only elicit a challenge from him.  Actuallly, after the “I am", I instinctively said “that’s enough. Just I am period.” I could do no better than that. In Exodus God told Moses, “I AM!”  St. Paul said, “By the grace of God I am. . .”  Jesus said, I am the way, the truth and the life.”  Even Popeye said repeatedly, I yam what I yam and that’s all that I yam.” My friend and I both understand that our “amness”, (essence, being, life,soul) is a gift from God.We are are gifts of grace as Paul says. 'Nuf said for now.  

VIETNAM CLUTTER

SPEAKER FOR VIETNAMESE AIR FORCE TRAINING GRADUTION

Today I literally wrap up a project started over a year ago.  I am sending to The Vietnam Archives at Texas Tech University my memorabilia, writings, pictures, books and letters.  This is a small step in cleaning out the clutter in my office and storage room. What is more import, perhaps, I can review and put behind me again, some experiences that reallly do belong in the past. I have not given this era much thought for years and now I am summarizing it from a more objective space. What I realize from this review is that the perspective I had of that war was not only vastly different from that of people who have not been there and equally different from all peacetime perceptions. As soon as we label some others “evil” and ourselves “good”, all understanding, reason and communication is distorted. This does not mean there is no such thing as good and evil, but that we rarely have adequate data for making such a judgement. (Only God has it). Hence we prejudge (prejudice) and operate on the facts and rumors we have. What this project can mean today is that I have a renewed appreciation for what our troops are going through and pray for their safety.

NON-ANXIOUS PRESENCE

Last week I read an editorial by a minister who listed the real problems facing our country, the variety of (usually) emotion-driven proposed solutions, and his own suggestion for  approaching the issues and each other.  He said we need a “NON-ANXIOUS PRESENCE.”  That phrase took me back thirty-five years when  Martha and I were studying and teaching family-systems. One quote that I find in my memory file is a comment by the noted biologist and family systems theorist, Murrary Bowen. He said that we will be doing well in our family-of-origin visits if we can maintain a non-anxious presence for as long as five minutes.  As I remember, he confessed that he could not do that. So strong is the pull to get in line with what the family needs us to be instead of seeing us as we are. I have a hard enough time realizing who I am instead of who I imagine myself to be.  At midlife I wrote about my own experience with that in my  book, Laying the Roles to Rest.  Today, as we plan family get-togethers for the holidays, I  might have opportunities to focus on who each of us is now, how we are all changing, how I can enjoy each “new being” in the present and the peace that brings.  

BOO!

The buried alive miners in Chilli are resurrected and the world rejoices with them.  Now  we turn our attention to two new frightening events--Halloween and the national elections, both featuring the scarers and the scared. Scaring each other and being scared are Halloween games we play in costumes and masks. Except for those making big bucks off of it, this holiday is mainly play. So we have crowds at haunted houses, costumed parties, and scary movies. It’ s all great fun, just plain play. On the other hand, the elections are deadly serious (except for those clever, blessed humorists that help us laugh at ourselves). Character assassination, for example, is not play.  Both of these big events dramatize our normal craziness, the dysfunction of the human race (sin). Our fear leads us along a predictable slippery slope. We begin with name-calling, then slide on down to yelling and screaming and then phyical violence. But the Bible teaches us how to stop this very human reaction to our insecurity: “mature love casts out fear.”                                                                                                                                                           

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